Archive for the ‘parenting’ Category
Generally you are going to want your kids to have a value you find important, the ones that have worked for you throughout your life. Have you ever taken a good look at what they are? Identifying values you find important is the first step in teaching your values to your kids. Make a list of values that are most important to you. Brainstorm as many as you can think and write them down, the order does not matter. Then after you run out the idea, go back and prioritize the list from most to least important.
1. Cleanliness – a habit of keeping clean.
2. Courage – state of mind that enables one to face danger or fear with confidence.
3. Friendliness – state of being likeable to another person, enjoyment in their company.
4. Honesty – quality of being truthful.
5. Kindness – quality of being warm hearten, considerate, humane and sympathetic.
6. Responsibility – state, quality or fact of being accountable.
7. Compassion – deep awareness of the suffering of another coupled with the wish to relieve it.
When you have handle on which values you find most important for yourself, go back and make another list of the values you want for your kids to have. List the reasons you want your kids to have each value, and how you feel he will benefit.
Discipline is a very important aspect of parenting and it is beneficial when done properly. When discipline a child you are teaching her which behavior are important and which a not. She in turn learns to make good choices not on bad ones. Here are some important skills that she will carry with her into adulthood.
Positive attention is very important to notice when a child is exhibiting good behavior not just when she is misbehaving. Look for opportunities to encourage the behavior that you want to see. Let your child know that you appreciate her help with things and that you have notice how good she has been as of late. By doing this she will see that good behavior pays off, and continue to exhibit it rather than misbehaving.
Disciplinary actions, there are number of tactics that may be used to successfully teach children how to behave. These are considered positive discipline. Removing a young child from situation is a worthwhile tactic that allows her to redirect her energies on more positive activity.
Parents receive a lot of suggestion on how to raise their child, the expert and other parents always ready to offer their advices, although there is more than one right way to raising a child, a simple techniques like providing discipline and spending time with them apply to every style of parenting.
TECHNIQUES, this is one of the most important in parenting technique this is effective discipline. A discipline given by parents is eventually leading the children on learning a self discipline. Children will pick up on a parent’s value system and learn difference between right and wrong which will guide them throughout their lives. Spending time with children is another important parenting technique. Parent can do this by making sure that the family eats together, attending children activities in school and communities. Spend time together can improves communication between parents and children. Although you may not agree always, showing and being positive that you understand will teach your children that they can come to you about anything.
First Parenting Tip – Question Yourself
1. How is my child reacting to my demands? Notice his body language and his words.
2. How can I prevent my child from being anxious, angry, or stubborn?
3. How can I raise my child without pressure and build character too?
Second Parenting Tip – Appreciate
Develop an eye for appreciation. Instead of insisting that your child do more, notice what she’s already done. Drop the pressuring. Increase the motivation with compliments. You could say:
1. You’ve worked so hard on your homework, why don’t you take a break?
2. I enjoyed watching your face at baseball practice because you smiled, laughed, and encouraged your team.
3. Your room looks good, especially the way you made your bed.
There are parents who might ask, “Are you nuts?” To them I’d answer, “If what you’re doing is causing anxiety, anger, and resistance, what have you got to lose? Why not practice the tips?”
Third Parenting Tip – Motivate
1. Share, read, and talk about inspiring stories of heroes. Why stories? Lectures irritate and stories motivate.
2. Post an inspirational quote on the refrigerator each week. Discuss it. Challenge each member of the family to do something inspiring too. Make sure the challenge is their choice.
3. At Sunday breakfast, ask each member of the family, “What did you do during the week that you’re proud of?”
Remind them, “It doesn’t matter if you succeeded. It matters that you tried.” You’ll love what you hear.
Conclusion for Building Character without Pressure:
You don’t need to raise an anxious child. You don’t need to discipline with pressure.
You can build character by improving your discipline, appreciating your child, and using inspirational stories. Motivate your children to discuss what they’re proud of too.
If you do, you’ll be raising a loving family. The kids will achieve and cooperate. One more thing, you’ll be raising children with character.
Children will occasionally misbehave. It’s a fact of life, so you need to get used to it. However, it’s your job as a parent to teach proper behavior. For example, if your child is being disrespectful, you need to correct him, not yell at him. That only teaches him that yelling is an acceptable way to communicate with people. Become a positive role model for your child and correct his disrespectful behavior by remaining calm and in control.
Give your child a chance to recognize his disrespectful behavior. For example, he may rudely ask you to pass the salt. You need to take a deep breath and then say something like, “Let’s start over,” or “What do you say when you ask for something?” This may prompt him to correct his bad tone and say “please.” This little reminder may help before the situation escalates.
Tell your child he is being disrespectful. You can’t ignore the disrespectful behavior or glare at your child. So, take your child to the side and explain that he is behaving in a disrespectful manner. Keep your voice calm, and do not allow yourself to become agitated. Explain the proper way to behave and ask your child how he would feel if someone spoke to him that way.You want him to feel the effects of his behavior, if possible.
Give your child consequences for his disrespectful behavior. He can’t expect to get away with his attitude; there has to be some kind of cost to him. So, punish him according to his age. For example, a young child may need a time-out. The point is to make your child suffer the consequences of his disrespectful behavior and think twice before he does that again.
Single parenting is not only hard on parents, but on their children as well. Children have had to deal with strife between their parents and now must deal with living separately. Despite the negative associations with single parenting, there can be positive effects for children, too. Single parents should be diligent in watching for negative side effects and work on prevention of long-term problems related to living in a one-parent household.
A lot of parents find it very difficult to get their children to listen and behave appropriately, to be honest; it doesn’t have to be that hard. It’s really up to the parents to teach their children listening skills. If your child isn’t listening to you, it’s time to take a deeper look into your parenting skills, take a deep breath, there is help. Here is my simple tip to help your kids to listen. Consistent parenting means sticking to rules a 100% all the time. If you sit and yell or nag at your children to listen, without any consequences, your children will never take you seriously. You must stick to rules and enforce them. Actions truly do speak louder than words.
Although each parent has his own style of parenting, there are some common ways to build a good parent-child relationship. Being a parent is not easy, but the joy a parent gets from watching his child grow into a responsible individual is worth the effort.
For Babies – some babies are more sensitive and want more attention. Give as much attention as your baby asks for to build a strong bond. Some babies cry more than others. Don’t take it personally. Remain calm and take turns holding the baby with other adults.
For Toddlers – parents to guide their children, not control them. Don’t try to mold your child into the person you want him to be. Guide him as he grows older by sustaining good behavior and values, but let him develop his own personality and path in life. As your child begins to talk more, it is a good time to use the verbal instruction/explanation technique. Communicate to your child what it is you want him to do and why. This helps him understand how to make good decisions and is also effective for pre-teens and teens.
For Teens – For teens (and pre-teens), establish and enforce rules so they know what is expected of them. Grounding can be an effective technique as a result of breaking a rule or to discourage bad behavior. Missing out on fun things with friends or family discourages the behavior from recurring. Withholding privileges is also effective for teens (and pre-teens)–if used sparingly. They must learn that trust, respect and privileges need to be earned. Take something away that they value–such as watching television or going out with friends on Friday nights.
Whether your child are in home schooling, preparing him/her for kindergarten either in private or public school or simply feeding his thirst for knowledge by supplementing his classroom lessons, there are numerous simple way to support your child and abundant resources to help them through his growing and learning process.
Always talking or conversation to your child of any age can benefit the learning process in more meaningful way than textbooks or chalkboards. For elementary school age child subscribing to an educational reading and magazine with them likely to hold interest in the various subjects when it is presented as fun activity rather than as a required lesson. For the adult child, respectful interaction about religion, politics and other social issues can be stimulating, particularly when you are asking their opinions and valuing their input as well as providing feedback and facts regarding your own thoughts.
When do you take action? Sooner rather than later is always the best. You can immediately begin to more closely monitor your child’s activities. Have a few conversations. Ask why he/she is using drugs. Get to know your kid’s friends and their parents. When you get a better idea of the situation, then you can decide what the next steps should be. These could include setting new rules and consequences that are reasonable and enforceable — such as a new, earlier curfew, no cell phone or computer privileges for a period of time, or less time hanging out with friends. You may want to get them involved in new or other activities that will keep them busy and help them meet new people. For more information about how to address your teen’s alcohol and drug use and how to set and enforce rules, see our resource list at the end of this page.